Anyway, the point of this post is to vent my anger. There are two types of people i'd like to channel my anger towards but one type has a sub-type, lol. Getting very detailed and very GP. I think i'd make a good writer.
Put in the most simple terms, slut-shaming happens when a person “publicly or privately [insults] a woman because she expressed her sexuality in a way that does not conform with patriarchal expectations for women”#1.0 The people who think that all women MUST dress and portray themselves appropriately, whatever the basis of appropriate is
I was arguing with myself on whether i should answer this in an immature, bratty way(like this person has phrased her tweet. I actually prepared a whole paragraph on ways i could scold this person), or in a mature and less angst manner. I chose the latter because i am educated and i was taught to rebut in a calm but affirming manner. By the way, this was a tweet by a prominent social media "celebrity" that i think everyone is familiar with. I won't lie, i've been thinking about this tweet since last week with the intention of understanding the moral standing of Singaporeans regarding issues that affect gender and sexuality. A person's social media account is entirely up to HER to control. She can post whatever she likes, whenever she likes, as long as it does not breach the guidelines set by that social media platform. Macro: The world is becoming extremely liberal, gay marriages are being accepted in many, but few societies. With my knowledge, I don't think it is being accepted here, with traditions aside, due to falling birth rates. To me, that is an acceptable and valid enough reason. Gay marriages aside, with the world being more liberal, since when did a girl's dressing determine the way she really is as a person? By showing a lot of skin on social media makes her trashy? Sure, that was the thinking when the first few social media platforms emerged with the rapid acceleration of the Internet Age which was....in what 2008(my estimation lol when i first joined Facebook)? Yes, i cannot deny that in the past, many people were not open to accepting the idea of girls who dress skimpily on the Internet but it has been YEARS. Times have changed at an exponential rate, people's thinking will ALSO HAVE TO CHANGE. In fact, majority of the society has already adapted to this change and have become more accepting. We see it everywhere, remember Pink Dot? Micro: It is her right, to post whatever she likes/wants. It is not in your position to past derogatory remarks about her, calling her trashy(this means low/no quality, akin to rubbish and trash). People's posts on social media only reflect a fraction of their lives, it should not be something you use to judge the person as a whole. You'll never know, before, she might be a person who suffered from extreme body image problems resulting in disorders such as anorexia/bulimia. Her showing off her body and speaking well of herself is a way of letting her feel that her body and her life is nothing to be ashamed about. Her showing off her skin is part of her recovery? If we do not accept these people, who will? If she just likes showing off her skin, just let her? Confidence is hard to come by for majority. My younger sister is amazing and so super hardworking, and i adore her. But she will never see herself the way i see her. Her confidence and esteem is low, and it hurts me. I love her and i adore her attitude towards her studies(which is mother trucking important pls!), i wish i could be like her. But she never stops talking about how her friends adore me instead. This lack of self-confidence in a person, does not only hurt her, but also everyone who cares about her. So if showing off her skin is a way of boosting her confidence, what say do you have in whether she should be doing it or not? In fact, if i see a girl/guy posting sexy or hot pictures of him/herself on social media, i'd look up to that person for his/her confidence and courage to post it. How would you know if the person is popular only for her body? The person might be an inspiration and most likely be popular because people look up to them for idk, the way they are not affected by what anyone thinks of them? I'd love that, i'd love to not be affected by what anyone thinks of me. So i learn and look up to people who are popular BECAUSE THEY ARE NOT ONES TO BE MESSED WITH OR CARE WHAT PEOPLE THINK. Lastly, this person who tweeted this was a girl herself. It worries me. It worries me that women look at each other as competition for all the wrong reasons. Compete each other for attention, compete each other for fame. This, is the true definition of trashy. Why must you compete each other for popularity in all the superficial and wrong reasons? Compete with people for knowledge, don't compete with people for little and insignificant things like, likes on Instagram? #1.1 Ohsofickle(tammy)'s pregnancy. // On a side note, the word slut should never even exist. I hate the word so much. Why are man "sluts" given such a long and inconvenient name like, "man whore" but a female "slut" can easily be called, well, just slut. Okay maybe guys can be called sluts too but honestly, when someone says the word slut, how many percent of your thinking automatically matches that term to a female? I am extremely happy for her because i don't know what can match up to a mother's love, especially a single mother. I can tell that her love for her unborn baby transcends all meanings of love, her love is the purest kind of all. Sure, it was an unplanned pregnancy, she should have used protection. But protection or not, what are the odds that contraceptives can 100% prevent a pregnancy from happening? Everything happens for a reason, whether that reason is apparent or not. Unplanned or not, her healthy pregnancy and the innocent life that she chose not to end, is the most important. Nothing else matters. That aside, why is it when a girl is prominently sexually active, she's immediately labelled as a slut. I don't understand. What about guys who are prominently sexually active? "Oh, that's normal." Sorry, that's bullshit."We need to stop teaching our daughters to always be quiet and apologetic. They are instructed to walk on ice and carefully string words as they trip over thin tongues while our sons run rampant."There's nothing to be sorry for(in other words, shameful) when you create a life. Why do people care so much about their face, image and most sadly, their reputation? Reputation is a just a made up notion, reputation is unfair and unjust. A person is not a slut if she gets pregnant outside of marriage. I thought that was a duh thing. She just simply, got pregnant. How do you know the true number of men she did or did not sleep with? Have you been keeping tabs on her since the day she was born? What about the guy? Is the guy innocent for ALSO not having the self-control? It does not matter who initiated the sex, the guy is equally responsible. Why should you worry about how a complete stranger will raise her child? Ohsofickle is a pretty well-established brand, i'm sure if Tammy has the means to afford luxury goods, she can afford to care for a child. Her child is her responsibility, i bet she knows that as well. Mothers(majority) would rather themselves die of starvation than to let their kids ever suffer, it's maternal instinct. No one will understand the position or standing of a mother or a mother-to-be. I've been following Tammy for a while, and i'm sure, given her background, she will be a good single mother to her child, as her mother has been a good single mother in raising her(Tammy). I salute and respect single mums who have to support their child/children and still have to face societal criticism because like i said, no one will understand a mother's plight other than a mother. The issue of marrying her child's father(baby daddy is another phrase i cannot stand. Stop using ghetto lingo, its so uncouth). HALLO????!!! She can marry whoever she pleases??!!! Or not marry at all!!???! There are so many single mums(who might be asexual) who adopt children on their own accord and can still raise the children well. It is her choice, like it was her choice to let the little life in her to continue living. It is also her choice to get married. She's 23. Not 16. Not 17. 23. All grown up and ready to take charge of her own life. Why do people think that she must get married to her child's father? Like i said earlier on, people need to learn to MOVE ON WITH THE TIMES. Women are capable of ANYTHING. Tammy is her own boss(since she owns ohsofickle), she can work and take care of her child anytime she wants at her own pace. Traditionally(only valid if you're still living in the 20th century), she should not be having a child. Logically, she CAN have and afford a child. A person who got pregnant out of marriage is not a slut. A person who sleeps around is ALSO not a slut. Slut is an extremely sexist term which should be abolished. #2.0 Adults who totally disregard other people because they think they are the most worthy I eat a lot of sushi now because i need carbs and i do not wish to or like to take animal products unless i'm forced to. Today i was buying sushi and my hands were full from all the goodness i was going to put into my belly. This lady beside me was jostling and messing up the entire area to look for the one she wanted. The one she wanted turned out to be exactly what i wanted. I didn't bother to even move for her or even react to her. I just wanted my shit. I shifted a stack of sushi boxes around AND FOUND THE LAST BOX OF SUSHI I WANTED. I didn't even have the time to put down the other boxes i was holding and she SNATCHED THE BOX AWAY FROM ME, HOOOOOOOOOOOO THIS IS THE BEST PART, looking at me and saying thanks with a smile. I didn't even look at her, i saw her from the corner of my eye. I was furious. I put my sushi down and used all the vulgarities i could use. I was famished, in my PE attire, just finished NAPFA, sweaty and smelly AND TIRED. This was my fate. All the way to the counter i was just spewing vulgarities at her, but she obviously pretended she didn't hear me and was "talking on her phone." When she left, i didn't stop spewing profanities. I cursed her to choke on her sushi and die. Yes, that was how furious i was. I really hope she chokes on her sushi. Don't mess. The entire time i was blaming the entire adult population for thinking that they can "bully" students just because we are in uniform. If i wasn't in uniform i would have gone physical, no, really. In the future, when you grow old and when i have to work, i'll have to pay tax to ensure people like YOU can live properly. That was what i was thinking the whole time. Adults better start being grateful and nicer to students who will become taxpayers in the future, and who will then pay tax for their healthcare. I'm in school to earn a good job, just to pay tax in the future to help a person live when she stole my food, i could have been dying but she obviously only cared about her fat arse. Should just let her die BUT I CANNOT. I MUST PAY TAX IN THE FUTURE. FOR HER(PEOPLE LIKE HER) TO LIVE. URGH. My uniform does not limit my rights to fucking eat to survive. My uniform should not drive me to the depravation of my vital needs. No one's uniform should be the reason that one is deprived of NEEDS(like food, water, shelter).
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On a lighter note, International Women's Day is this Saturday! Celebrations will be held at Hong Lim Park from 4pm onwards!! I might be there because i want to go haha but you should too if you're free! This is in no way a form of advertisement, i'm just giving exposure to a cause that i strongly believe in :) For more info, you can visit the AWARE website!
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